Drive. Align. Shift. Spirit Driving Institute Blog

Cruise Control Makes Me Feel Out of Control

As I mentioned in my last post, I had some insights about actual driving and Spirit Driving while on my recent roadtrip. This first one cracks me up.

When we're driving, my husband likes using the cruise control once we're on a nice stretch of highway without a lot of traffic. He always encourages me to do the same. I've used it a few times, but something about it makes me feel out of control. I always worry that I'm going to have to change lanes or slow down suddenly and that I'm going to forget which button to press.

My husband will say, "Don't worry. You know how to do it. Hold down this button to slow down and this one to speed up." Inevitably, when the time comes when I need to accelerate or decelerate, I get flustered and decide to stomp on the gas or the brake. It still accomplishes the same task, but defeats the purpose of cruise control. Then, I tell my husband, "See, I told you I would forget."

The reason this cracks me up so much is that our little exchange about driving is very similar to the way we converse about goals. It's very hard for me to just go with the flow. I'm always trying to plan ahead and anticipate the next step. I feel that I can only get ahead if I'm in control and don't have some outside force guiding me.

But, guess what? There are outside forces that guide all of us. They aren't steering for us, but they do help us to move forward. It might not be at the speed that we want. And it might not be exactly the way that we envisioned. Nevertheless, it's going to happen. And we can't completely control it. Yes, even the author of Driving to Success has to remind herself of this sometimes.

No matter how in control you feel when it comes to your goals, no amount of planning can guarantee "success". I put that in quotes because success defined in this way means getting what YOU want. If you've read my book, you'll know that that isn't the true definition of success. When your Spirit is driving, what you get in the end might look quite different from what you envisioned. But it is exactly where you needed to be.

While in Denver on vacation, I drove past my old graduate school and had a bit of a flashback. I remember going to the lab sometimes late at night and checking on an experiment. I would imagine the day when I would be a professor and have my own lab. Had I continued on that path, I would probably be finishing my postdoc or starting my first job in academia right about now. My goals revolved around that. I hadn't thought about having a family or having my own business in a completely different field.

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I've completely denounced that scientific part of myself. Sometimes I reminisce about my days doing experiments in the lab. I still have plans to incorporate that in my professional life, but in a different way. My Spirit has driven me elsewhere and I'm better for it.